Wednesday, November 30, 2011

I Have A Secret...

I'm a perfectionist

These days, Its a very common word to throw out there, along with OCD but I  struggle with perfectionism on a daily basis. Sometimes it inhibits me from finishing projects because I am so overwhelmed by the thought that they will never be "good enough" in my eyes. Sometimes my perfectionism inhibits me from doing daily activities because of the intense anxiety I feel. The overwhelming feeling of "not being perfect" exhausts me from day to day. If my sewing isn't perfect, I will rip the stitches out. If my idea isn't executed the way I first saw the inspiration in my mind, I start over. Its frustrating, tiresome and overwhelming. I often hear the words: "you don't need to be perfect." The comforting words of wisdom from those around me make sense in my brain but I'm not able to turn off the behavior.  I wish I could but I am trying. Each day I am trying to learn how to change my way of thinking about perfectionism.  I try not to be so hard on myself. I try to remember that mistakes are ok and that they are part of our growth and learning. I try to remember that vulnerability isn't a weakness, its a way of identifying with each other as human being to human being.

Why am I sharing this with you?

Because I know there are other women struggling with this very issue in their lives and because part of changing the cycle of perfectionism for me has been understanding that I am not perfect by truly believing those words... and knowing in my heart that when I admit them, it doesn't make me any less of a person.

So I am happy to tell you that I am not perfect.

My sewing isn't perfect

My Embroidery isn't perfect

My painting isn't perfect

My baking isn't perfect

My cooking is really not perfect

My blogging isn't perfect

and I'm ok with that...



Michele {The Scrap Shoppe} said...

Preaching to the choir. :) I know (though not always intentionally) a lot of bloggers come across as being absolutely perfect. Perfect crafts, perfect baking, perfect homes, perfect children. We just have to remember that all of that is just a fantasy. Nothing is perfect! I love it when bloggers show their epic fails. It makes it easier to relate to them. And I think more and more of them are realizing that and sharing their fails with the rest of us. :)

wonderfullymadepursuits said...

thanks for sharing. ;) I think that sometimes the imperfections are what make things the most beautiful. my brother made me a pepper grinder with this beautiful, smooth, purple wood. but he built it around a dent/hole/imperfection the wood had in it. I think it's made much more beautiful because of it. know that you're not alone (not by a long shot!) in your struggle.

Stacey@A Sort Of Fairytale said...

i am like this i can appreciate and relate to what you are saying here. i think i even posted about it a few months ago...
in some ways it's good to strive for the best, it makes you better at your craft, but then you can be your own worst enemy also. don't be too hard on yourself about being the way you are, some of us are just wired that way, and it's part of who we are I guess. learning to manage it the best we can is all we can do. from an outsider's perspective, you seem pretty perfect to me, and I bet your family agrees too!

Stacey@A Sort Of Fairytale said...

P.S. come link up your shop to my Etsy link party...the post is up now!

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